WAH says he wants to work on the M

[addie]

Hello everyone! I've been posting in Newcomers for over a year but have decided that it's time for a change and that this forum may be the best place for me.

Since last June, H and I have been living 4000km (2500 miles) apart. For months now H has been telling me he wants us to work things out. Here is the background info for anyone who is interested.

Why are we living so far apart??? It's a long story but here goes...
In Sept 07 our family moved on a trial basis due to H's work. I was able to take a leave of absence from my job and a family member stayed here in our house while we were away. I left behind a house, family, friends and a very good paying job to try to make H happy. We were getting along very well at the time although my H has always been very dissatisfied with life.
About two months after moving there H started to become very distant and I quickly realized H was having an EA with his assistant 20 years younger than him. I confronted him, he denied it, I asked him to stop, he wouldn't...I asked him to move out. After moving out it quickly became a PA. At this point H suggested I move back to our home town where I could return to my job in Sept and to our house. I waited until S's school year ended and did just that because I had not established any sort of life for myself there - I had no job, no family, no friends and no H.
In the meantime, I DB my butt off and the A ended in May. H moved back in with us shortly after but I had already made all the arrangements to leave and H didn't suggest I stay until a couple of days before I was scheduled to move back. After I left, H felt abandoned and the addiction with OW continued. H kept seeking her out, he also placed ads in the personals, joined a dating service, all the while telling me he was sorry and wished we could work things out.
So where do things stand now? H claims he wants to "work" on our M. I'm having a difficult time with trust seeing we're living so far apart. I'm also having major doubts about whether H could ever be happy. He's never been happy in the past. Unless H does a lot of work on himself nothing will really change.

The above was taken from a post last Oct. and not much has changed since then. H calls every night to speak to S and me. He has come for several visits and things have gone well. He tells me often that he's been a fool and that he wants his family back together more than anything. However I don't trust him and am having a difficult time dealing with it. I know for a fact that he is still having some contact with OW - they work on the same floor although no longer work together but I also know he has initiated personal contact with her even recently. How do I believe anything he is saying when I know he is lying to me about contact with OW? I don't think there is anything going on because she no longer wants a R with my H but I think he keeps pursuing her. I'm very close to the point of moving on with my life because I am so tired of this but at the same time I don't think I can move on when he's telling me he wants us to work things out.
I'm very confused about how to handle all of this. Thanks for reading.