I've moved here from MLC

[AJM]

Because I feel like my husband really believes he wants out. He is calling me "the future ex wife." That can't be good.

Wish I'd seen this a few minutes ago. That's so very much a part of the script. You shouldn't believe it. Even if he tells his friend this. Why? Because he KNOWS his friend will talk to you. It's an easy way to hurt you. Childish I know, but it really is part of the WAS playbook. Classic from what I keep seeing over and over on this board even for those relationships that work out and those that do not. This is not what he really wants, but he may not know what he really wants.

My suggestion? Don't bring up the divorce again. Don't even react to it if he brings it up.

My thought? He doesn't want out. He wants things to change.

Does he want freedom? Of course. Does he want freedom from you? I don't think so. I think he's confused alright.

I also think you need to leave him alone with son. If he calls and asks for your help, make your decision, but I think you should have something else you're doing. Don't return his calls quickly. Wait a little while. He's a grown man. He can bond with and raise his son. Get out of the way and let him. It's part of it.

My thoughts.

AJ