Maybe I should be in piecing part 7?

[Hope4us]

Thank you Break. I hadn't thought of that. When I first found out OM was a player I kind of figured he'd spun his web and W got caught up in it, but then when she said she knew where it was going and did it anyway, I kind of threw out the idea that she was an innocent victim in the mess. No, I'm not absolving her of her part, but you're right, there are these kinds of predators out there and with our move, she found one. Stupid thing is, of the things she said made her vulnerable to the A, I'm not sure if they were things she noticed or if they were planted in her head......

Your statement makes sense that even if she knew where it was going, he might have been still controlling the direction.

I'm sure his previous affairs came up in conversations with W when he played the "poor poor me, my marriage sucks, blah, blah, blah". I've read numerous places that that is one of the players first lines in the conquest. That allows the victim to think about their marriage in a bad light which is right where the player wants them to go.

I think your comment about her not being sure how or why it happened is pretty accurate. There have been at least 3 things that went on during the time of the A (2 non A related and one related to the A) that she just doesn't even remember. I think she recognizes what made her vulnerable, but I really think she doesn't have a clue how she let it go there.

She said to me Saturday night, "I don't know why I did it. That's not the kind of person I am". And she's exactly right. That's not the kind of person she is, but it happened.

I have educated myself enough about all this to know that it can happen to anyone if you don't protect yourself and your marriage by having a plan in place to not let it get to that point. I think it was very telling when W agreed with my question that she felt he was safe because he was married and so was she and before she knew it it was too late. Guess that kind of falls in line with your comment about the predator he is. Just reinforces my thoughts that he needs a good a** kicking.

This has helped Break. Not sure if it's helped enough, but it's helped.

Thanks.