Thank you for posting. I always was interested in you and your situation... You have an awesome career and lots of personal strengths. It still seems possible to me that you might want to consider repairing the relationship with your H. He has regrets it seems. His impulse control mechanism is broken. Maybe it is part of an alcohol problem, really.
It seems you do have choices. Maybe you should carefully permit yourself to reconsider a friendship with your H. You are still grieving so much, and I am sorry. Good luck, no matter what.
