My birthday is Tuesday. SO had asked me if I wanted to "go to the bar" with some friends of his, as it's St. Patrick's Day. I don't drink, SO doesn't drink, and his friends are much younger - in their very early 20s.
I told him I'd prefer not to and he said okay.
When I called him later in the evening while he was at work, he asked if I'd be okay with him going when I was asleep.
No, it's not okay with me. Something about that just seems weird, waiting for me to go to bed so he can go out and play?
So I told him honestly I was uncomfortable with it.
I did some thinking and decided it was obvious he really wanted to go. Otherwise, he wouldn't have asked twice. I made plans with a friend so I could go there, and he could go to the bar.
He got very mad at me, yelled at me over the phone, and told me I "only did it to make him feel guilty." Which, frankly, wasn't the case at all. He said he was going to the bar anyway, because he "didn't give a crap" how my birthday turned out at that point.
We had a nasty fight. He went to the bar after work and came home stumbling drunk - the first time I've EVER seen him drunk since I've known him. So drunk, he fell out of bed two hours later. I let him sleep on the floor, the jerk.
We talked about my birthday again three days later, after everything calmed down. I said that given the whole ordeal, I don't CARE what we do, I just want to be with HIM on my birthday.
He abjectly refused to "let me" go with him to the bar him at first. But after talking more, he said he'd prefer to "play it by ear" and see how my mood is that day because he doesn't want to bring a buzz-kill with him to the bar.
Like I'm a six year old child and if I display good behavior I'll be rewarded.
I'm fed up. I don't know if this is worth it anymore.
NO move I make is right, I can't talk to him without an argument and he obviously don't give a crap about my feelings.
UGH.
Bomb Dropped - 11/08 Working on the R - 12/08 (thankfully short period of time!) Still DBing to see positive changes!
