what saff said...you have to do something different whether it's true detachment or really opening up. Get moving so you are not stuck anymore. And don't let him determine whether you can move on or stay stuck. Only you can do that anyhow.
Guess I'm wondering about his depression too... I mean, how are you doing? forget his needs for a bit, and deal with your own. It's an interesting dynamic wherein you assume some sort of role that appoints you as his happiness barometer, but he is living with OW...it is what it is... Not a 2 x 4, but a GAL pat. And your dissertation work is interesting and exactly where some of your energy must be. Just mho.
(( j ))
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
