Hi guys, it has been a sick weekend. Because both of my kids were sick. My son got the virus from my D and they were both with fever. Yesterday H called early to say he was coming over to help me out with them.
When he arrived the kids were all over him hugging him, feeling very happy. And I did too. I just hugged him and told him I dont want us to divorce. He hugged me back and kissed me on my cheek and neck. He never left. He stayed here last night. It was a quiet, calm weekend and we were being together "easily". We never spoke about anything or hinted about anything. Last night, it was very late and he suggested we watch Gran Torino or Slumdog Millionaire that my brother gave me in DVDs. We were going to but the kids were restless till very late and by the time we were alone it was too late. I said I was sleepy and was going to bed and just told him to not fall asleep on the couch. He came to bed later, our S was in the middle but in the morning, he got him out of the way and slept holding me.
When it was time to go, he came and kissed me on my neck and caressed me.
Ever since I told him my wish is not the divorce (that's how I stated that) he seemed relieved.
Dont ask me why I did it (if you cant see why). I followed my heart. I dont know what's gonna happen. But yesterday, I was prepared for any way he would respond. And I felt happy about it. I knew it was what I wanted to do.
I am not blinded or super optimistic. All issues still exist. But I am just following my little voice and it feels great. K
