Naej.. why dont you contact your ex? You had 30+ years together and 4 kids and besides, what do you have to lose by contacting him to say hi? He did contact your daughter recently didnt he? Why not hey.. Kat.. glad that helped! It is the worlds leading website! I dont think he's turning though. Julia - yes, funny, an hour and 20 seems to be our usual limit!
The call hasnt really affected me too much, I have just been getting on with my dissertation today. I'm sure I will feel less good about it over the coming days though! He sounded bad, very down, said work was awful, his house was cold, he is tired all the time. He moaned alot about his Mum, brother, his friend at work and about work. Then he said.. I just go to bed early EVERY night. He said works so bad and he's so tired and the house is so cold, he just goes home and goes to bed. Why would he say that !!?? He's clearly in an R with her, so NOT going straught to bed (or perhaps he does, being depressed?) every night.
Bad news is, he did admit he is working on this big road project again (the one where he met her!) and he moaned alot about that and how boring it is, but that its going on for "months and months" - so thats bad as I know she is working closely with him on it. He just sounded terrible, kind of stuttering and stammery and nervous and very down. He did relax, mainly when he was telling me that he is lerning to swim and how much he is loving that. It upset me a bit, as I had nearly got him swimming lessons as a present just before he left me and he wouldnt discuss it with me (as I guess he knew he was leaving).
I gave him the choice of where the solicitors papers get sent and he agreed with me though, better they get sent here.. then he said there will be stuff for me to do and sign.. so although he didnt mention meeting up, he implied thats what we need to do and he didnt take the chance to get stuff posted directly to him at least.
He asked me lots of questions and the convo was more even this time, as opposed to previous phonecalls where he would mainly just talk about himself. It wasnt so jokey on either side though, bit more real. I admitted to having a tough time at college and a bit of artists block and stuff about my diss, whereas before I would never moan or complain or anything but be upbeat, so there was a very differnet feel to this convo.
At the end of the convo, he said "so.. you alright then?" in a very serious, emotional voice.. I ummed and ahhed and paused and then said something like, um.... well its lovely to hear from him (as I couldnt bring myself to tell him I missed him!). I made a big fuss of thanking him for the present, how touched I was, that it was very thoughtful of him (to let him know I took that effort asg a sinificant statement on his part). He said several times he had 'hoped' I would get it in time/really like the book/like the music..that he was glad. I asked him if he was ok and he sounded awful and did a "ohhh.. yeahhh.... oh alright I guess" sounding anything but. Before we said goodbye, I said it was lovely to chat to him, he said it was lovely to caht to me too, speak to you soon... oh but chat to you on email as well... He did sound so low though. Sigh.
