My guess is that what you're feeling is totally normal, especially if she hasn't "come around" with regard to intimacy without you fueling it.
It sounds like she feels that she's "giving you sex" in the name of saving the marriage. If she were working on her own sex drive, she would feel like she's taking as much as she's giving.
This is tough.
Is she doing anything to work on her own sex drive? Exercise, dressing sexy, massages, pedicures, pretty lingerie, porn... Anything?
I think that if our LD partners do nothing different other than have sex with us more, the disparate drives will always remain an issue. I don't think it is easy to change drives, but to get closer together by having the LD partner work on increasing drive through exercise, losing weight, healthy diet, reading, etc., might be possible.
