DA Club III

[pearlharbr]

Well, still planning on going to the steakhouse tonight. Invited to hang for St. Patrick's Day tomorrow but I think the crowds will be too big and not worth the effort it will take to get to the bar, find parking, and try to get in before they reach capacity. Will probably opt for returning (the opposite of shopping), cleaning the house, reading a book or two, finally watching my Netflix movies. Only problem with these activities is that I told xBF I wouldn't be around this weekend so he can't come over to see the cats. I hate being a liar, so I'll try to stay out of the house.

What's the weather like over there? Can you take S12 to play putt putt golf? Or maybe bowling? You can wear your new jeans to the bowling alley.

[kassie]

Could someone give any reasonable explanation for why H keeps calling when I said no contact. He used to call when drinking but he isn't anymore so what is the deal? I feel like he needs a reason to be rejected and I would really like to live my life without the stress.

[JDOllie]

Kassie - just don't answer phone.

Pearl - you're allowed to change your mind, you know!

As for me, day 5! I kind of didn't keep track of my starting day, so I'm thinking it was March 8th, so I'm going with that. April 8th here I come! I don't really plan on stopping at that point, but need to set manageable goals.

[Tawnya]

Pearl..ha..I may take son bowling tomorrow..Sundays they have some sort of special for bowling or something Thanks for the thoughts..it's yucky and rainy :P OK..so have fun at the steakhouse tonight I bet it will be crazy with green beer LOL

Kassie..yep..agree with JD..don't try to reason or rationalize it, just turn off the phone and/or don't answer If you turn it off, then you won't feel badly when he calls!

JD..good for your goal setting..and go you

I guess I had to start over in my day count, drat it all, but glad JD started over with me so I don't feel so bad I am on day 4 then :P

Tawnya

[kassie]

H called last night asking to get together today - said if I don't call back he will know I don't want to. I didn't.

Today he calls to see if I want to get something to eat. I wasn't around to get the call and just didn't return it. His words -" I guess the answer is no if you aren't answering the phone."

This is hard, because I feel rude. Does anyone else ever feel rude about not answering or returning calls. And, I do keep it off most of the time so I don't know he is calling. I actually heard earlier this week that he did call over the weekend but my phone was off.

I am feeling a bit angry too. What part of no contact do he not get?

[Silver Fox]

Hi Kassie,

Yes, I've felt rude at times too. I guess that's the difference between the WAS and LBS - we're still careful of their feelings and they could give a rip.

I've ignored the last 3 emails/notes H has sent. It's hard but I know it's the right thing to do now - especially after a year of being "friendly".

I don't have children but it must be like punishing them for something they've done - you feel horrible but you know it's in their best interest. And you know not to cave or they'll learn to manipulate you.

Just like a child, your H is testing you. He doesn't believe you're really serious so he keeps trying.

Stay strong.

[kassie]

Thanks Silver Fox,

I think you are sooo right - he is testing me - definitely his MO. So I am willing to do it. I will just soothe my conscience and make adjustments in my thinking for the sitch.

[pearlharbr]

Did some returning today. (Un)fortuanately I did some more shopping too! Did manage to make it to the steakhouse for a late dinner in the new purple dress and purple pumps. I ate too much but it was good.

I've seen the future and I'm not sure I like it that much. The bar was full, decent number of single men but none of them attractive. Also no young guys but there were a few cougars. I chatted with the man sitting next to me. Recently divorced real estate agent who talked about the fun things he did around CO with his kids. Not my idea of a great conversation but at least it passed the time.

So tomorrow I will focus on cleaning the house and doing laundry. Not much GAL but about all I can handle for the rest of the weekend.

[Tawnya]

Ooh yeah {{{Pearl}}} I just asked about the dinner on your thread Woot..well since you returned and then bought, did you even out?? LOLOL

Yeah..I dunno that the "bar scene" would ever be my scene..like you said..that future is not pretty! My mom told me that what she said was "Ok God..you know I work all of the time and have young kids, so you are gonna have to bring Mr Right to me in one of those scenarios" LOLOL..and lo and behold, she married my stepdad who is a doctor

Tawnya

[pearlharbr]

Oh heck no, of course I spent more than I returned! But I'm looking at it as building a whole new SF wardrobe so I'm going for quality over quantity.

Good thing I'm not looking to date. Sheesh! The real estate agent was ok, but felt like he was more interested in listing my house! When I said we weren't selling, xBF will keep it, the conversation slowed down.