Hey Sad, Glad to hear that you're going to change your nickname...that's a positive step.
You're definitely in a tough situation - but you're getting some fantastic advice here...all I can do is echo what you've already heard - perhaps just adding that as you find yourself you will discover a kind of strength that you may have lost somewhere along the path of your life...you're now being tossed in a process of change and growth - and you can either let it crush you or you can use it as a rare opportunity for self improvement.
Early on in my situation my wife was getting into an EA - she had already had a PA three years ago with another man. When this EA started I simply said to her that we had a enough to cope with without that sort of distraction for either of us - and asked her to remember that if she had a conversation with another man that she would be uncomfortable for me to hear if I were in the room - than it was probably a sign of a friendship heading in the wrong direction. It was simply a matter of respect...and I offered her that same respect in return.
