Your title caught my attention...are you Dutch ? Afgewerkt....
Anyway, I'm so sorry to hear about your divorce, it's something I don't look forward to, and having to divide our kids seems horrible too....even though I let H have them as often as possible, and we stick to our 'agreement'.
Well, I live in Belgium but am Dutch...
Take care x
Love Cinders xxx
"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus
{{{{{LO}}}}} Congratulations on finally unloaded the legal burden. Now YOUR new life starts. You did the best for your daughter. Your EX will (if he hasn't already) see the good part in you, rather than magnifying the bad part. But who cares about him now?
Take care, do some more shopping, things are such a bargain now.
{{{hugs}}} I am proud of you for your strength and getting through the D with dignity. You are a beautiful person. I wish good things for you. Hang in there buddy...
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
Cinders.. I am Dutch.. Although "we" have been in the US for 3 generations my Dad was the first to screw up the "bloodline".
OC - good to hear from you. Hope things are good with you and H.
tal - unfortunately, no peace until we sell our house!
Thanks Root.. Thanks for all of your great advice through my ordeal. I think I have grown into a stronger person.. Or, maybe just starting to find that strength again. As for getting through it with dignity.. Sometimes it was more like getting through it kicking and screaming.. But, at leat I GOT through it!
Yoyo - thanks for checking in again. I hope that you soon have some resolution in your situation... Either way, it's good to finally be out of that horrible in-between..
All is right in the world tonight since my little girl is home and asleep in her own bed
Weird things.. I think lwb had this happen with her xh, too. He's being way too nice. Nice in a "we're friends" way. It bugs me. He also thinks we can do family stuff. I can't stomach it. Especially in front of people who don't know we are D'd. I've never been good at faking stuff..
I also recently got the "I messed up" speech. It doesn't change anything but probably relieves some guilt from his shoulders I guess. UGH!
sometimes I'd rather he behaved like a jerk, as being "nice" reminded me too much of what was or should've been, could've been. I keep stbx chit chat "nothing happened here folks" attitude in check by going to the point when we have to talk about kids or stuff, if he asks me stuff not related with kids I just say "I dont know" and immediatly change the subject, I think he's got it by now, we have nothing in common anymore other than the kids.
Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2
30something 2kids survivor of S, MLC, A, D I have peace in my heart, at last.
He's being way too nice. Nice in a "we're friends" way
Yup. Been there, done that. Still there. I try so hard not to read into it (like he is thinking "Thank goodness she is not my wife anymore, now we are just friends, easy peezy"). We didn't have it as rough as you guys, didn't fight over time with the girls, and of course original OW is out of the picture, so those things are so much easier for me. Easier for me to put it aside, don't question it, and just enjoy the peace between us.
And its odd, sometimes we'll eat at a restaurant together (with the girls) and from afar, you would think we were a happy little family. It doesn't bother me anymore, but I went through that "This fake family stuff makes me sick". Now, I'm good with it. I guess because its not fake in a very important way. Its a mom and dad, that love their children and put them first. Make sense?
If it bothers you, don't put yourself in those situations. You deserve every minute of your life to be yours, and should decide what you want to do with it!
PS: Never once got any sort of apology or an "I messed up" speech. You are right, it probably wouldn't change a thing, but at least your x is feeling some of those feelings.
