Another update I know she has also been scoping out new places for her and the kids to live as well as studio apts. for me. You see we live in a rental which I feel she will just say if I don't move out she will move out with the kids and then I have no say. Feeling increasingly scared; I have no job, we are just now filing bankruptcy, I have no savings, and I have no were to go except to my parents 1/2hr. away to sleep on the floor.
What am I to think of that? 1) is she so over our marriage that she just does not care about my feelings at all?
Sad,
Your wife will start caring about your feelings once YOU do, and not a moment sooner. How can she respect you if you don't respect yourself?
And women tie their feelings of LOVE very closely with their feelings of RESPECT for a man.
As for this:
Quote:
So when she came in I handed the two envelopes to her and said, "looks like you got some concert tickets, good for you, I am glad to see that you are continueing to make plans to go to concerts". I then said, " I know how important they are to you, i am happy to see your taking care of yourself by doing what you love." Then I just smiled and moved along with making dinner.
I just want to say to her, "If you already know your totally done, grow a spine and just tell me, don't leave me hanging thinking there is some small chance."
You see she is teling me that in her heart she is done, she doesn't want to try anymore, the emotional and verbal pain I inflicted ruined the marriage. Hear is a quote when we talked earlier this week,"I think being married to you was always unhealthy for me and our marriage was so unhealthy she needs to remove herself from it."
So I have epeatedly asked,"so does this mean your done and over it, and should I just start to move on with my life because we have no chance for reconciliation, because I need a starting point so I can get on with my life if that's the case."
She always replies," I have told you how I feel in the way I know how to, and as far as me moving on with my life that's up to me." She then says, 'right now in this moment she doesn't know if she is done and she can't and doesn't want to redict the future."
So I have epeatedly asked,"so does this mean your done and over it, and should I just start to move on with my life because we have no chance for reconciliation, because I need a starting point so I can get on with my life if that's the case."
She always replies," I have told you how I feel in the way I know how to, and as far as me moving on with my life that's up to me." She then says, 'right now in this moment she doesn't know if she is done and she can't and doesn't want to redict the future."
How do I respond to all of this, whatshould I do?
Sad, I want to ask you a serious question, and I want you to really think about it:
No, you can't, but "Oooh, pretty please, will you STILL stay married to me?" approach isn't working.
Stand up for yourself. Even your username is "sad", and you need to stop angling for your wife's sympathy and pity, and start angling for her love and RESPECT, instead.
And THAT starts, by respecting YOURSELF enough to stand up for your own boundaries of personal integrity, starting with the concert tickets. Why are you so afraid of her?
I am. I'm saying that if you can't stand up for yourself, I really can't help you, and I'm wasting my time. You're being a total doormat, and I can't get thru to you. Maybe someone else can.
