Hey Mish.. sorry! Its going to be a 2 day course, maybe by April, but they still havent published the dates yet! Its something I really want to do though, if I can. Chers going to come with me.

Hey GFI - I'm not so sure anymore ..."Perhaps its a sign that the tide might be about to change"... and this is EXACTLY why I feel like I am going nuts (see Kalnis thread for the Uranian explanation):

I thought the tide was changing a year ago, lat Fenruary when he kept coming over to see me and his BMF W back home told me he had drove home in tears to tell BMF he had made a mistake in leaving me. I thought it was turning when he called me every night and took me out for dinner every week and cried and told me he was sorry and depressed. I thought it was turning when we stayed overnight with me and wrapped his arms and legs around me and introduced me to friends and spent the weekend with me. Then he started dating her and stopped all contact dead with me. I thought it was turning again when he invited me for that drink in Novemeber and cried and said he didnt know what he was doing but that he missed me and it wasnt going well with her. I thought it was turning when he phoned me for an hour and twenty and sent me a christmas present. I thought things were turning in February, when I heard all those things he said, that he doesn tknow why he left, thought he had an MLC, she doesnt get him like I do, he missed me and what we had and our homelife. I thought it was turning when he was very low recently and said he was going to end it with her and then was emailing me so much more frequently and finally asking questions, showing an interest.

Nothing... never materialised. So now he sends me a present. But I called him last night, no reply, no text, no email today. I'm not seeing tides turning, I'm seeing a stagnant lake.

I could manage a friendship with him if he would allow us to have a conversation about what happened, release me from limbo, but I cant see that happening. Unless I tell him to leave me alone, which is an option.

For anyone reading this tempted to bash me/2x4 me... please dont. I just wanted to vent. But if anyones got a view to help calm me down, shoot away! Its done my head in this week that he would send me such a lovely present when really, like the counsellor I just spoke to said, all you really wanted, what would have meant more to you, was if he had just picked up the phone and asked how are you? And then for him to not even email me, it IS driving me crazy. Its so confusing.