Yes her reaction may be hysteria, crying, etc but you need to let her go through that. Don't dance to her tune. She has you wrapped around her little finger and you're still making decisions based on how she'll react. You need to stop that. Make decisions based on what's best for you and your kids. If she has a tantrum if you tell her you're staying, so be it. She'll get over it.
What CanItWork said. ^
Do NOT, under any circumstances, move out of your own home (talk with a lawyer -- in many jurisdictions, it can be viewed as "abandonment" and be used against you). In fact, don't move out of your marital BED.
For women, feelings of love are EXTREMELY tied to feelings of RESPECT. Your wife has not, and WILL not, respect you if you appease her.
Get the book that he suggests -- I'm a semi-reformed "Mr. Nice Guy" myself, and its concepts were EYE-OPENING.
