sex and the WAW

[garyjlost]

DQ:

You said:
"She needs to talk about it so she can help herself understand what is really happening when she goes off after a pirate. If she doesn't take the time to learn why she does this and what the attraction is for herself, then you two will have twice the battle you already have. She doesn't necessarily even have to talk to YOU about this, she could do it in counseling."

Yes, I agree totally. But right now, she refuses counseling. We tried it and she rejected it.

You said:
"Also, why can't you be a ruthless pirate? Of course I mean only in the bedroom or in the seduction process, not in life...but why can't Gary be the sexy pirate who wants to ravage her?"

Well, you know, in one of the very few times that she gave me any insights into her preferences regarding sex ... it was just a few weeks ago. I was putting some moves on her, gently kissing her back as we lay in bed, when she became sort of frustrated.

"Just grab me rough, and take me," she said. "Can you do that?"

I was surprised. Then I did it. I try to be more forceful now, but I'm not good at it. Sometimes she wants the sensitive guy who gives her backrubs and cherishes her. Other times, she wants Captain Jack. Arrr. She doesn't drop clues as to which mode we're in. And I'm too dense apparently to pick up on the hints (if the hints/clues indeed do exist).