Update: I spoke to my pastor yesterday. He made a few observations I'm still digesting in light of the idea that not every situation is the same. . . .
He mentioned unconditional love. I said I was like the father in the prodigal son story. He countered that if I am, then I should not be wondering about the past at all. The father didn't ask his son if he felt bad or was sorry for the way he treated him. He expected nothing, but gave his unconditional love and welcomed the son back. He suggested I should welcome her back the same way. Hmm....
AJM,
I'm not that familiar with your sitch, but I have read over two of your threads just now.
Your pastor brings up a great point, and I don't necessarily disagree with him. But I do think that the heart of the prodigal son (repentant, contrite) has something to do with the moral of the story. If your wife were to be unrepentantly staying out until 3am again, I think you'd have a right to enforce your boundary.
Jesus tells the story of a man who has two sons. The younger son asks his father to give him his portion of the family estate as an early inheritance. Once received, the son promptly sets off on a long journey to a distant land and begins to waste his fortune on wild living. When the money runs out, a severe famine hits the country and the son finds himself in dire circumstances. He takes a job feeding pigs. He is so destitute that he even longs to eat the food assigned to the pigs.
The young man finally comes to his senses, remembering his father. In humility, he recognizes his foolishness, decides to return to his father and ask for forgiveness and mercy. The father who had been watching and waiting, receives his son back with open arms of compassion. He is overjoyed by the return of his lost son! Immediately the father turns to his servants and asks them to prepare a giant feast in celebration.
