WP, I gotta disagree only because I've been following pooh's sitch since her H reminds me of mine. From what I gather she has been showing him love, pursuing, and reaching out to him. They have remained connected but in a weird/unhealthy way and I think her H has gotten the impression that the A and his lifestyle may not be accepted by her but that she will go along with it. And he hasn't found a reason to change. Pooh, please correct me if I have this completely wrong. I only suggest the going dark/detach in order to then establish boundaries, to let him know that his lifestyle/actions are not acceptable. Pooh, strange enough, I don't think the D will send that message only b/c I think your H will still come around and you will still pursue and you both will function in the same manner/play the games like you never divorced.
I'm saying this only b/c my relationship with my H has been the same that I have told him his A is unacceptable but I have not shown him this with my actions.
