I am sorry it has come to this. I 'obsess' a lot the way you do. Meaning I keep asking the questions of my husband because I am not getting real answers. "Why did you say you wanted back in if you weren't going to really try? Why do you say you love me and then do nothing? etc etc etc etc...."
Our MC told us over a year ago, "Ask your question once, and you must make yourself accept the answer. You cannot keep asking the question until you get the answer you want because that may never happen." H reminds me of that sometimes when I keep asking the same thing...
I know you were wanting some answers for the sake of reconciliation or for the sake of closure. Even if he had said, "She is not my friend, she is my lover, I love her, I want to spend my life with her." Even though it would be terrible to hear, it would give you some answers. Anyway maybe I am rambling I am just trying to 'see' where you have been coming from.
The problem is sometimes they will not give us the answers because either they can't or they won't. I am leaning toward won't at this point...
Thinking of you and hoping that you can begin to heal and move forward with your children, rebuilding your life and rediscovering the sunshine.
