{{{Abby}}} welcome to the board, tho I hate that you are here! Amy and Sandi are fantastic and I really can't add much to their words of wisdom!
I just wanted to let you know that I have been married for 20 years myself, my kids are 18 and 13, so I understand that part of what you are going thru!
You totally got great advice that the BEST things you can do are the things just for you, with no regard to how it will affect your husband or your marriage.
Please post on here as much as you need to. We are here if you need to vent, cry, be angry, need a laugh, or whatever!! Just know that, as alone as you felt, you aren't alone anymore!
Tawnya
Me:39 H:40 D18/S12 M20/T21 Bomb 10/11/08 One Two Three Four