WAW - Very confused and devestated - pt 4

[AFWAW]

You know, I've gone through your thread and I see a lot of positives. And a lot of confusion on her part and yours. You have to act as if the relationship is working. If you don't believe, she won't. You can't just act like it though, you have to keep doing the stuff you're doing. The problem is, you're not believing it.

The big positive I see is your wife is still in the house. She gets to see your act 24/7. So, it's got to be real. While you may have more opportunities to screw up, you have more opportunities to get it right as well. I on the other hand rarely see my wife--only when she comes over and then I have to really watch what I say and do and make the time that I have count.

From what I've learned here in this forum is that you can't believe anything you hear and only half of what you see. Believe me I know it is hard. I'm in agony myself everyday.

Keep your chin up. From all the feedback you've gotten, I'd say you're doing ok despite the sitch. And another thing--I've thought about this for a few days--Are you selling yourself short? By that, do you think if this doesn't work out that she is the best you could have had? I thought long and hard about this and decided that if this goes through and my wife leaves, then I will find someone better, not because I'm shallow but because I deserve it!

BTW this comment that you made:

The one thing I don't do around the house is clean the bathrooms. I know how much she would love it if I did, but even I have limits!

Who do you think is going to do it if she leaves? Clean the damn toliets! It's easy and you might be surprised by her reaction if she notices. Hey, you never know!