Pearl, As to Puppy's point - there is a lot of validity to that point. I didn't conduct myself worthy of respect for a long time - I finally did AFTER W has started an affair, and now she's noticing, but it is a long road to haul. From another perspective for you, I know I made significant and permanent changes that warranted respect, and W sniffed at them at first, and said it was all a game. It took probably 2-3 months for her to start seeing that I was serious. If you do indeed find the stomach for it, it's really up to xBF - he has to earn the respect, you can't just up and give it. I've earned by sticking to my guns no matter what W does, and now she knows it.
It's funny about what you're feeling about the respect and emptiness - I've been thinking to myself about the possibility of moving forward with W, and mostly it just sort of makes my stomach sink, and I'm angry at her, and I don't know if I can even do this, and I, too, don't know if I can trust her.
But, you know what I wonder? Is this how SHE felt when all of this started? It doesn't excuse leaping into someone else's arms, but is this what it feels like?
