WAW New life with OM

[ppenton]

I'm having a down day today and am very tired for some reason. Keep thinking about W and missing her lots for some reason today. Not sure why, so trying to PMA and to concentrate at work.
I do have IC later this afternoon, which I think will help.

[runningoutoftime]

It's a roller coaster ride. You have to expect that. IC should help.
Hang in there!

[ppenton]

IC did help today and he told me its normal and natural to be up and down. told me not to worry, I'm still doing a great job. I felt much better after my session. Came home, went for a long walk and made dinner for me and the kids. Then went to the HS for a meeting about getting ready for college, S15 is a sophomore and its never too early to start thinking about schools.

[runningoutoftime]

Good to hear the IC helped. Walking should be helpful too. You might want to make that a regular habit. Anything that gets the endorphins going is helpful. It's also good that you are focusing on the kids.

You are right, it's never too early to start thinking about college. My son is 14 and I talk to him quite often about different career ideas based on his ability and interests. Next month one of the local junior colleges is going to have a career fair for students and I plan to bring him there so he can start getting some ideas.

[ppenton]

Runningoutoftime, good idea taking your S14 to the career fair. My S15 is very interested in something to do with the physical therapy field. He works/assists the high school trainer during basketball/wresting season, he plays football and baseball. I do try and walk most days, if it’s really crappy out then I go to the YMCA, but I prefer to walk outside.

[ppenton]

Going to see "Milk" tonight at the show with some friends and then for pie/coffee afterwards.

[ppenton]

Well, Milk was very good and the pie was excellent...

Today, my parents, S15 and I cleaned his room, it was a real mess. Then we ordered pizza and hot wings and are watching Harry Potter.

S13 is out of town with a friend and his grandparents.

W was not around this weekend...not sure why she doesn't want to spend time with S15 but that's her loss. He's a great kid and they used to be so close before she told the kids she was moving in with OM. Still hard to believe she moved in with OM after only knowing him for a couple of months. I guess she knows better than me. I wouldn't want my kids to move in with someone they barely knew. But that just me...:)

[ppenton]

Well, the financial issue has come up again, here is an email from her:
W conferring with her IC regarding our financial arrangement, and in accordance with his very strong suggestion, W went to the bank this weekend and changed the password and access to her checking account. BEFORE you freak out - let me explain. I still plan on giving you everything/anything you need/ask for, but I would rather GIVE it to you than have you just TAKE it. Need to feel I have some control of my financial situation. Since, she is not a saver and I don't trust her and obviously the OM cannot afford her, I'm worried about how I will pay for all the bills for the house, kids and her.

Then there is this staement at the bottom of her email:
"Call me soon, or something, would you? I miss talking to you."

Well, guess what I miss having you in the house and us being a couple so boo hoo that I have not talked with you in a long time.
Do all WAS think the world revolves around them?!?

I'm looking for an attorney and find out what I can about this situation.

[smith18]

Hi ppenton -

For someone that has been in this situation for a short time, you sure seem to be doing everything right. There are good days and bad days and it seems like you are well grounded.

I know for me, whenever I took control of some aspect of the financials (ie shared accounts) or the legal issues, it gave me strength. You are best in getting some legal advice now. I was lucky as my cousin had recommended a great attorney for me. You might ask friends and associates. Walk away from the sharts that start talking about nailing her financially.

[ppenton]

I'm much better now than I was in January. Have learned a lot about myself and how strong I am these past few weeks.

I have not replied to her yet as I'm not exactly sure what I'm going to say yet. I did get "Divorce for Dummies" from a co-worker and the attorney's name she used.