Ali - stressed he won't pick up the phone ... to phone you?

You still haven't phoned him? Why not ? You have BIG news to share with him!

...some men are avoidant - I was - avoided the harsh truth, avoided what was obvious, avoided reality...is this a male trait? Or one that is more obvious on this board?

Saffie is onto something here though Al - make sure that if your exBF does move back into "your space" that you're sure that you have a plan to sort that stuff out...it might happen - it might not - but its worth rehearsing i think...

Without being going overboard with expectations or hopes ...this might be a time to consider your "terms" - especially in light of your new found and wonderful "Ali"!

Best - GFI