WAW - Very confused and devestated - pt 4

[confusedinpa]

I wound up taking my boys to soccer without my wife. I told her that I would likely take them to the gym or the park with me after so she would have some extra time to finish the work she still had to do.

She wound up calling me twice while I was at the gym - my cell was in my locker so I didn't get the call. Perhaps that was a good thing.

Anyway, on the way home from the gym, I called her back. She wanted to know when we would be back as she was starting to get hungry. We wound up going for a nice lunch as a family.

When we got home, she wound up on the internet (Ebay'ing) while my youngest napped and I played video games with my oldest. After an hour or so, I went to pull our summer stuff (it was 60 degrees today) out of the shed. Then I woke up our youngest from his nap. The 2 boys and I cleaned/vacuumed both the cars and the garage. She even brought out a beer for me - she saw I finished the one I had and asked me if I wanted another one.

She made us a nice dinner and we even wound up joking about our "hook up" on Thursday nite. After the kids went to bed, I told her I was going to watch Fireproof and asked if she still wanted to watch it like she had said a few weeks ago. She said she would.

During the movie, she said that it really hit close to home. She didn't cry, but I could tell she was getting a little upset/mad maybe? We watched just about the first hour (up to day 18 of the love dare). She got up and said good nite. It was almost 10PM (during the week we had been going to bed at 9:30) and she was tired from being out with her girlfriend until 11:00 PM last nite. She said I could finish watching it if I wanted to, but I told her I would like to finish watching it with her tomorrow nite. She said she would.

Fortunately she didn't bring up any of the moving forward with the separation talk so I didn't have to figure out a way to ju-jit-su out of it. I'm still looking for some help on how to not get sucked into a relationship talk when she brings that up.

She did make a couple of comments during the movie.

First was about the flowers (I think that was day 3 of the Love dare - "investing" in your wife). She said I had brought flowers 6 times in the last 2 months. She counted them off - first was a day after she hit me with the bomb (I got her a dozen roses with a card saying I was sorry). Then we went on 2 date nites and I got her a single rose on the first date, and a small bundle for the second date. Then I got her a bundle for V'day, then her B'day and finally my "Kenny Rogers" rose/move.

I didn't realize she was keeping count...... 6 in 2 months sounds like a lot, but if you drop out V'Day and B'day, guess that's not too bad...... I know way too much pursuing...

She did make a comment about the Love Dare book - as when it got to day 2, she asked if this was the same as the Love Dare book we looked at in Target. I told her I really didn't remember that. She seemed frustrated about it. I asked her how far back that was. She said it was over the last couple of months. She seemed to be getting really annoyed. I appologized as I had been looking/reading so many books lately, I really didn't remember looking at books at Target.

Then she reminded me that we were there right after we saw the 20/20 on love chemistry (I forget the name of the book, but it was about the 4 types of people, builders, explorers, and a couple of others). I remembered at that point but I could tell she was annoyed I didn't remember. That is something I can easily say whatever about - as she has a memory of an elephant.

I told her that I will look it up on the internet to find out some more.

So she went up to bed, I gave her a kiss on the check good nite and she's in the spare bedroom.

Oh well, whatever....

I could really use some suggestions how to avoid the relationship talk when she starts talking about moving forward with the separation....