Sweetie, you're in a funk but try to realize it is all part of the journey. If you weren't in a funk now and then, then YOU wouldn't be driving YOURSELF toward a better tomorrow. If you just accepted things as they are but didn't like them, then you'd end up just lonely and bitter. When your psyche does like it is doing today and cries out for more happiness, it will prompt you to find whatever changes you have to find to acheive it. Without the crying out, you'd never even look for changes.
Don't accept just "good enough" ever! Keep fighting against it, even if only on this board and in your private thoughts! Don't be complacent when you know you truly want MORE!
That of course, doesn't help you feel any better, especially not right now. But it will help you to not succomb to the feeling that you are simply supposed to go along with something you truly don't want to go along with.
Question: (spoken in Dwight's voice, from The Office): Have you ever had a blow up at hubby and said these things about him being too considerate? I'm not suggesting you do, I am just wondering if he has any clue how you feel?
Because I think there could be ways you could tell him how you feel without losing it on him, but you are too close to losing it right now to say anything.
Not saying anything will just build resentment forever and then when you finally do say something he will just be getting a storm of unresolved feelings....which (as you know) isn't fair to him.
This isn't really advice, just a question so we can look at how to maybe handle thingg in the future.
My fear is that you really do need help as you are slipping into a depression, but you won't ask for it. :0(
