My first step out of Newcomers

[Can it work]

It wasn't a good night last night. Things were fine when I picked up Wee Man and took him home. He was on really good form and loads of fun was had by all. My mum was over and I made us both spaghetti bolognaise for dinner. We watched a little TV with Wee Man while he finished his dinner and then had a lot of fun at bath time. He then sat and had his bottle while watching some Thomas.

The trouble started when I tried to put him down to bed. I could tell he was so tired but he just wouldn't entertain the idea of going down in his cot. This is really unusual for him since he's always been such a good sleeper. Because we changed the nights he was with me this week so my W could move in to her new house, he's not been with me for a week. I think that he's just not used to sleeping at my house any more. He was just screaming horribly every time I tried to put him down. I'd even leave him for a while but it was relentless. At that point I really hated my W for doing this to him. In putting herself first she's disrupting our poor son's life and it's beyond me how any good mother could do that to her son. I know it wasn't necessarily the reason he was unsettled but it's the way my mind was working at the time.

When I dropped him off at my IL's house this morning I got a chance to speak to my MIL. She agreed with me that this is very hard for Wee Man and it's such a shame. She also told me that she had been hoping that my W would have come to her senses by now. This obviously isn't the case. however, she did say that my W seemed more relaxed around me now which is something I've noticed too. Maybe it is a positive step in the right direction but I just don't know. Right now, my mindset isn't allowing me to believe that things can turn around as much as I still want them to. I did see someone write on another thread that with a WAW, you really can't expect anything to turn around in at least 6-8 months. This is the first time I've seen someone quantify it and I have to admit that it gave me something to work towards. I know every case is different but I just need something to aim towards. 6-8 months seems like a realistic target to know if things are improving or not. That is unless she gets involved with someone else. Then I know that the time will probably increase. My mind just really isn't in a good place this morning.

As for my W coming and getting things when I'm not home PM. We've already agreed on the stuff she is taking and I knew that she'd be over to collect them when she got the keys to her house. It's not too much of an issue but it is hard to see another step in our separation taking place. That's the only part of it that bothers me. In a way it was still comforting to have a lot of my W's things still around. This weekend will see the end of it though. I guess I'm just going to have to learn to cope.

Kev