I was only half serious when I posted that comment but I'm glad I did now. Some insightful information...... thanx.
Ah okay, well yeah some good did come of it, it helped me refocus on my recovery also. In fact, reading back I said to myself "damn I need to take my own advice!"
Quote:
Seems like there could/should be some kind of "in between". I hate feeling like a beggar or emotional slave and think some of these ideas would make me feel like that. I'm more than willing to give and even grovel sometimes but not as a regular pattern/the norm. This sure seems hard sometimes - it's such a process - and a delicate one at that. The *zone* is narrow and moves.
That's also part of the puzzle. When you feel like a beggar you act like one. She sees this and it is not attractive. In fact it is very unattractive to a woman. A good rule for you is never again will you beg, grovel, be a slave to her. The problem is when our spouse occasionally rewards that behavior, we subconsciously learn that it is a strategy for obtaining sex. Meanwhile it is actually doing more harm to our chances by making us "biologically unattractive" to our mate.[/quote]
NMMNG, gogogo!
Spellfire aka Mike
"Women do not like controlling men. They respect and are attracted to men who control themselves. They ultimately are repelled by men who allow themselves to be controlled." -S&A
