Yes many of them want us to make the decision. They THINK they know what they want but they aren't really sure. That is where the confusion starts.
I want to share with you, my H gave me every reason in the book why this should be over. That I did or didn't do things, that it is him not me, ILYBNILWY speech, and about a million other things that I can't even remember right now. What I'm going to tell you is really hard to understand at the beginning. This could change. It really could. Last summer, I never would have dreamed that anything would be different. After hearing the things I did come out of his mouth, after listening to him tell our S that he had no say in any of this (we have always decided everything as a family,), after hearing him say that whatever happened was OUR choice (sorry not mine). Maybe I had to be to the point of acceptance to sort of get out of my funk. I think so. I think he has needed it to and I don't think anything is near done in any respect. But now, months later, I am no longer down, my PMA is not a front, something is shifting and I'm not getting nuts about it. So trust me on this, if I ever thought there was no case for hope it would have been mine (sorry when my H decides something, there is no going back). I don't know that I would call it hope now. Maybe forward movement with and unknown destination. LOL. Just hang in there. You are trying to push this. You are taking his statements as gospel. You will probably hear a million times more that it's over. But only you know how long you can do this.
Please be careful with R talks. They will hurt you and what you say to him, will be twisted in his mind and come out as somethign very very different from what you said or intended. I know the limbo is the pits. That is something I know well.
If you focus on the past, you ruin the future. You can only live for today.
