have i told ya'll lately that i love you? thank you all. after the day i have had today, and talked to my pastor and a great attorney friend, i am gonna have to file legal seperation, for my health, for my life and the kids to be secure. i wont file divorce, AND its gonna be in the papers WHY i have to do this, thus H the ow, the lenght of affair and the Child. AND its also in there, the kids can see H just not around OW.
not what i wanted, but, what i have to do, even my pastor agrees, sorry if any of you feel i failed. its been a long hard day, and i as much as i dont wanna, it is the best.
M 36 XH 34 3 children If a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand. Mark 3:25 "your mood swings are giving me whiplash" twilight ALIVE FREE AND HAPPY 2010
.....sorry if any of you feel i failed. its been a long hard day, and i as much as i dont wanna, it is the best.
Shame on you, BG, for even thinking that!!!! You have always been and continue to be a shining example of true strength, honor, grace and dignity under the worst of circumstances!!
We love you, Wonder Woman, and stand behind you all the way!!!
(((((((((((((BIG HUGS))))))))))))
TJ
Me45,H49 D24,S18 M26,T28 Bomb 3/19/08 Sep 6/23/08 EA/PA with Secretary 2007-8 3/2009 H moved in w/OW2 7/2009 Let him go w/Love. 8/2009 Legally Sep'd
have i told ya'll lately that i love you? thank you all. after the day i have had today, and talked to my pastor and a great attorney friend, i am gonna have to file legal seperation, for my health, for my life and the kids to be secure. i wont file divorce, AND its gonna be in the papers WHY i have to do this, thus H the ow, the lenght of affair and the Child. AND its also in there, the kids can see H just not around OW.
not what i wanted, but, what i have to do, even my pastor agrees, sorry if any of you feel i failed. its been a long hard day, and i as much as i dont wanna, it is the best.
{{{{{BG}}}}}
My sweet, dear friend, you are FAR from a failure. You are a brave, strong woman fighting odds that are almost unfathomable. Filing a LS must be done to protect you and the kids and ensure that you are all provided for. You have not admitted defeat, you are just stepping back from the battle to regroup and fight another day.
I wish our weather was better here, I would have you come out so you could enjoy some warmth, some sunshine, some love, and have some quiet time to reflect and renew your spirit. Do what you need to do, what you can do, and rely on Our Heavenly Father to do what He must, too.
We love you and we are all here for you.
Living God's blessings with grace and dignity~ SMW
M40/H36 T16/M14 4K B2/08 S4/08 current
Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. I Corinthians 13:7
you are NOT a failure in any way. You know how I feel about this. That I support you because I think it is the NECESSARY step at this point. You CANNOT continue to live wondering if he is going to pay the rent because this afternoon he said he would and tonight he said he wouldn't. You CANNOT continue to live with him telling you he is not with you any more and then getting upset that he was locked out of his own house. You are not living in a world that should be dictate by H's "mood of the minute" that is not good for you, your kids, your health. Right now, it is what you MUST do for you. I know it is not what you WANT to do but you have not failed and like SMW said, you are regrouping and are going to live to fight another day. We all love you and have laughed and cried with you and been happy for you and angry for you. You are a shining example of strength, determination in the face of the most horrific odds, and a truly wonderful, kind, and loving woman. I thank you for allowing me to share in your world my friend. ((((BG))))))
If you focus on the past, you ruin the future. You can only live for today.
You remember the word you used to describe me "Amazing". You remember the reasons you told me you used that word and know that I came to where I am in part because of you and what I've learned from you. I would have given up the hope if I didn't have you as a shining example of it in my face all the time. So I want to share that word with you now and add it to my list of words I use to describe by BFF. AMAZING
Last edited by kelaaron; 03/04/0902:36 PM.
If you focus on the past, you ruin the future. You can only live for today.
(((BG))) a LS is not a failure and its not a D. It is a way for you to protect yourself and YOUR kids from your Hs stupidity and lack of clarity. I finally had to do it and it was the best thing I have ever done. It was hard but I haven't regretted it for one second. I love my H, even after all he has put us through, but my first duty is to myself and my kids and for once I had to put us first. In Cali. a LS does exactly what was said by another poster. It is everything that a D is without actually D. The property is split, the support and visitation is decided, etc... The benefit is I am still able to use his insurance for myself and we can file taxes jointly, which worked better for us. Here you only have to pay the filing fee once, but if you do modify it to a D, all of the papers have to be refiled and the waiting periods apply. I'm so sorry it has come to this, but you HAVE to take care of you and the kids and just focus on the things that are about you guys. I'm here and praying like crazy for you.
You are the furthest thing from a failure. People with your strength and character and spirit give the rest of us hope and are part of what keeps us moving everyday. Honey if anyone had a multitude of reasons to curl up and decide to call in not interested, its you. But you get up, take care of everyone around you, give selflessly, keep a pretty positive attitude and make the most of everyday. You are an inspiration and don't you forget it. (((love you lil' sis))
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
I'm gonna have to take offense to your statement about failure. Cause, if YOU are a failure, what does that say about me???? I've suffered way less than you, and I just sent my D settlement agreement back to my attorney for processing!!! And, I ain't no failure!
I know how you feel. I truly do. We all do. You work so hard at something and then it doesn't seem to go the way you want it to.
But, remember, that doesn't make you a failure! You have been incredible through the whole ordeal. You have loved H and his son (and even OW to some extent) in just the manner God expects. There's not much more you can do. I don't believe that God expects us to completely sacrifice ourselves for someone who's not willing to repent (how can God use you to do his work if you aren't around?). And, that's the way I see your H right now.
File for the LS. Make sure H knows why (everytime I send my H an email about the divorce, I always say..."So you know, I still think divorce is the wrong answer for our family." I did that today even.). That leaves the door open for him should he get his head straight down the road.
Keep you chin up, BG! I think you are awesome...and, with as much as I've read over the last 2 years...I'm definitely qualified to recognize awesome!!!!
Love you so much!! Amy
Me 39 H 36 S 7 S 4 T 15 M 12 H out 8/1/08 OW confirmed 8/6/08 D final on 6/12/09...I'm doing good!
