I started to write an answer, and the more I wrote the dumber it sounded.
Because I am. Because I don't want to push her even farther away. Because I don't want to be "needy" and "clingy." Because I don't want to look weak and have her see how deeply, deeply, deeply this hurts (the worst part is that she signs her text messages to OM the same way she signed every card she ever gave me from our first anniversary card 17 years ago).
