So sorry to be saying it but the sooner you face it, the better.
The bigger issue is get some legal advice straight up. You don't have to get a D, but affairs and the whacked out behavior they cause can financially ruin you. Get your money seperated from hers ASAP. A 25 year old girl out on her own for the first time, whacked on affair high, is going to do some stupid stuff. Just like the idea of working full time (for the first time), taking care of your kid and being a thousand miles away from any support system. It's gonna get messy, ugly and expensive. Perhaps she will come to her senses but more than one guy around here has been ruined by their wife trying to prove she can make it on her own, or not even caring and just plain bleeding him dry. Protect yourself. Do not let her take the kid. Odds are you are gonna get screwed either way. Don't wind up screwed, broke and with your kid 1000 miles away.
DO NOT worry so much about her happiness. That is the tendency of the newby in these situations. The inclination is to be super nice and to surrender your b@lls. It gets you nothing. It only makes you look weak. Hard to believe now but in time you will know it to be true. Be kind, be civil, but concentrate on YOUR happiness. You need to feel happy, empowered, strong. It is the only way you can attract her back. It is also the only way you can survive this crap.
Quote:
Another main worry is that down the road she will discover she still isn't happy. But by then I'll likely have moved on and will be unwilling or unable to take her back
DO NOT worry!!!!!!!! That is her problem. She is chosing to screw up 3 lives. She ain't worrying about anyone but herself. You want her to KNOW there WILL be consequences. Why in the world would you want her to think she can be wild, try other guys, screw you over royally and the have you waiting for her to return. What value does that put on you? Again, you want to be nice, civil, kind, loving... but you have to be firm and stick up for yourself. You have to love yourself first, then her.
Me 44 She 46 S13 D9 M18 T23 3 years DB'ing Successfully busted
