It's Not Like on T.V.

[Thinker]

Also, if you are into reading books, I would recommend 2 for you:

1) Not Just Friends - will help you to understand what is going on between you, your W, and OM

2) No More Mr. Nice Guy - sounds like you are similar to me in that you take care of people, focus on your W, etc. to the detriment of yourself. If so, this is a quick read that explains why this is not good (it's not really being nice, it's a way of being indirectly manipulative) and how to get past it.