It's Not Like on T.V.

[Thinker]

Wow, that seems fast. Is she already ready to tell them?

I would just play a delaying game - "Let's figure out what is going on first and tell them later"

It would seem to me that she is locked in and focused in EA and OM and can think of nothing else right now than clearing any and all obstacles to pursuing that life. ie once you have "Jointly decided" and "Jointly told the kids" then you are not "Really" married any more so she is free.

If this is her hidden agenda, have you considered exposing it? Have you confronted her (calmly, rationally) with the information you have and telling her that you know. If she knows that you know, and that you are not going to calmly agree to lie and say "We jointly agreed" and that her kids and others will find out what really happened, she may pause a minute to think.

Also A's in general tend to be shorter once they are exposed.

If you go this route, be careful, since if handled incorrectly, it could also chase her out of the house and directly to OM. The opinions in these forums seem to be split, but there are a lot of people who are very pro-transparency and exposure as far as A's go.