Hi JD, I have a new post, check it out if you can. I would have to agree with Tawnya. Nothing wrong with taking your time. Keep doing what your doing!!!
FACEBOOKS DOWN.... OMG WHAT AM I GOING TO DO. OH WAIT I COULD GO TO SLEEP... NOT
Hang in there my dear
H-41 (alcoholic) Me-38 D-13 SD-10 T-6yrs M-4.75yrs Bomb-10/4/08 Moved in w/OW 11-13-08
Well, the hits just keep on coming. W came tonight to pick up the kids, and came in again. I'm still baffled by the sudden turnaround - she never even got out of the car for the last 6 weeks.
And she came in and chatted - very confusing actions.
I think I do need to let it sit for a little while - if the actions continue then I think I'll have ammo to ask what is going on. I think it's too "new" right now.
I wish if she was reconsidering, she'd just SAY so. I am just being very pleasant, and letting her initiate the contact.
I guess after so long, you sit and wonder if there is a hidden agenda - or if they think they are acting "normally" and just being nice, but nothing has changed.
I guess the only way to find out is to ask, so I will soon. I shouldn't have to guess as to what is going on.
I have learned tonight that they will probably NOT just come out and say so. Details on my thread, but apparently xBF did stop contact with OW at some point but never told me. Of course he started up again without telling me that either.
I think you're right to wait and see. If this behavior becomes a pattern then you can ask what's going on. But until then it's just a random occurrence and should be put on the shelf with all the other behaviors your W has exhibited in the past.
(((JD))) You're doing really great.
Last edited by pearlharbr; 03/04/0906:34 AM.
If you love somebody, set them free. http://tinyurl.com/2empx2g
Agreed with Pearl..just sit tight and see what happens. Could be a few reasons why 1) she is confused and reconsidering 2)being civil and nice is easier for her and makes her feel like this is all "ok" 3)she is buying time because she doesn't have her ducks lined up or maybe something completely different. I wouldn't ask her anything right away. Just wait and see, but keep up your PMA.
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
Thanks, everyone, that's what I'm going to do - just sit tight. I guess what is confusing is the abrupt/overnight change - literally from Friday to Sunday.
Well, I am going to meet her to take S6 to the doctor, so we'll see how that goes.
I would definitely give it a little time. My W has had some pretty encouraging behavior at times also, just to go back to her busy "don't have time for anything" kind of behavior. You definitely don't want to get your hopes/expectations up and then get shot down. Just like you let her do the contacting, let her do drive the friendship thing too.
Hang in there my dear 