Well, the appraisal on this place came in 20k lower than the the lowest I expected. I think the appraiser is paranoid, maybe in these times he has to be, but I really think he lowballed. Anyway, it upset W pretty badly. And it makes it so that I can't quite get half the equity out. But, my payment will be less. So, we figure that I can up the child support a bit, she can then borrow a bit more, and still get about the same house in the end. Since we both think the appraisal is low, I'm willing to let the difference make up for that. (I guess in a way the low appraisal is a good deal for me, but it doesn't feel like it!)
The loan officer is going to call tomorrow, and I will figure out if it is possible to squeeze blood from a turnip!
I keep seeing in the news that Phoenix is one of the worst areas of housing sales in the country. You might be really lucky to be able to pull this off in economic times like this. Did you see the story about the couple that D'd but couldn't afford separate houses? The whole family still lives together, just not married.
So, how did you go from not being able to buy a mattress to buying out half the house?
Since this is a business deal, what is W giving on her half to make it fair for you?
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
(((((WCW))))) Luckily Tucson doesn't seem to be as bad as Phoenix. The loan officer said that everyone up there is upside down. That people bout houses for $300k, and can only sell for $130k. ACK!
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So, how did you go from not being able to buy a mattress to buying out half the house?
Don't ask silly questions!
What am I getting? The mortgage, of course! And in theory, I expect to gain a lot more equity from this house than she will gain, in the long run.
I was going to ask for separation sex.... I thought better of it!
(((((Lisa))))) It is still going to work. It's sort of a shell game. As long as W doesn't figure out the Ponzi scheme, I'll be fine!
Got a little blood from the turnip, it sounds like I can get a line of crdit on the house after the refi is done, and get cash their if I need to. Rate is great right now, will probably go up. But it could be useful in the near term.
I would love to do some experimenting with you!
On the base metals to gold thing! Maybe other stuff, too!
Jeff you ole fox you!!! Offering to do a little chemistry with Lisa!??? Hmm!
I'm so glad for you that there was good news at last with the finances and yes, mortgages are pretty cheap right now hey! Sounds like the kids took the news calmly too, no dramas.
You're being really brave you know, I'm in awe of how stoic and accepting you are being and I am so glad that you seem to be able to keep going down this path without regrets or even too much angst.. you really sound oK! (are you ok?)
M 36 XH 34 3 children If a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand. Mark 3:25 "your mood swings are giving me whiplash" twilight ALIVE FREE AND HAPPY 2010
((((((Ali)))))) I'd do chemistry with Lisa. Maybe other science subjects too.....
I really am doing ok. The kids are doing ok. W is a bit stressed (she's never really lived on her own), but doing ok. I think W is relieved, too. We are getting along better, in some ways, without both of us waiting for the other shoe to drop. I would have never expected it, but I am starting to think that for us, this is the right thing to do.
((((((WCW))))))
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Too funny! Ya never know if you don't ask!
I don't think I am going to give her the opportunity to reject me on that!
((((((BG)))))) You know, it's funny. The low appraisal means that it costs me less to buy W out. And that my mortgage payment will be lower. Since I really believe that it is too low, it means that in a way I am shorting her. I'm not going to go overboard to make up the difference, since the appraiser might actually be right (in this weird market). But, I will do what I can to make things work for her. And in the end, I will be doing pretty well, I think. She will be as well, so it will be ok.
We were talking tonight, she was feeling weird about the quilt thing. She doesn't understand why I would want something like that from her. I said, 24 year, 4 great kids.... Anyway, she asked what kind I wanted. Before I could answer she said she wasn't sure that a future wife (she thinks I will remarry) would want to sleep under a quilt made by an XW. I said I thought a wall hanging would be better, anyway.
Speaking of future W's, she said I should marry for furniture. We have quite a bit of house, with not a lot of furniture. And a lot of it is handed down, yard sale type stuff. So, maybe I'll have to make that one of the first questions I ask a woman, "Do you have furniture?"
W doesn't know exactly what she will take, it depends on the house she chooses. It son't matter much, other than our kitchen table and a china unit, there really isn't anything to argue over.
You do sound calmer. I know it is extremely sad after so many years and 4 great kids to fall apart like that but... we only have one life and you did all you could. Take it easy, I can see the light form where I m standing... xxx K
Thats too funny! (ok, not funny haha) "she said I should marry for furniture. We have quite a bit of house, with not a lot of furniture. And a lot of it is handed down, yard sale type stuff."
wow, that says alot about the kind of woman she is and where her heart is (very practical/pragmatic).. she suggests you remarry for better furniture, or was she joking !? Wow, I hope you remarry for passion and craziness and wild abandon and happily snuggle with one another on nothing but a pile of cushions, with a cardboard box for a table
I'm so glad that things are amicable between you Jeff and that you both can see that it is the right thing to do to let the other go. Boards are quite nowadays for us hey? Rememeber when we all used to break threads in a day or two!? Things move on hey...
