A small set back. I went down to say goodnight. Should have waited for him to come to me but what the hell. Think I'm over doing the turn around. I basically said I'd stay up while he charges car battery. Why did I say that? He looked at me like I was an idiot. Hope he doesn't think I'm putting on an act.
Anyway, think I'm over the shock and ready for the hard work.
You are going to say and do things that you wish later you wouldn't have done. Trust me on that one! It is normal. You are human, and you can't expect to be perfect at this! It isn't an easy road to be on, so don't beat yourself up. Just move on.
We all backslide and I think I'm the queen of it. Although MT would argue with me LOL. It gets easier as time goes by. I'm glad you had a peaceful time at the store and dinner. Sometimes that is the most you can hope for.
Remember hour by hour if you have to deal with it like that. Before you know it, it won't be in the forefront of your mind anymore and that is good.
If you focus on the past, you ruin the future. You can only live for today.
Well messed up. He came in to say goodbye and his face was tripping him. I shouted down to lock cats in and he gave this low sulky reply oh I'll try. I jumped out of bed and did it myself. He said what, and I said why are you making a big deal of it.
I ended up saying sorry but I'm so fed up with his looks like he can't stand me.
Husband just sold a very stressful business In a new job Tells me he doesn't/doesn't know if he loves me sleeping in separate rooms Understands how I'm felling (thinks he does)but shut down emotionally. No affection at all Is coming to counselling Is talking about how we will do our house up Is still contacting me via text Still making us dinner every night Is coming out with me later this week to discuss us, then go see a film.
No it isn't all bad. Have been waiting for you to see that.
I wish I could tell you this is easy. But if it was all bad I don't think it would be easier except that maybe you would have a better idea where to start. But you are now seeing the contradictions (didn't he also say liked new job then didnt'?), the confusion, and that it isn't all about you. Who knows how much of it if any is really all about you.
So now that you have a little clarity, time to start figuring out what to do with it. You can't MAKE him change his feelings, you can't make him be happy at work. But you CAN make YOU happy, you can validate when he talks, you CAN listen, listen, and listen some more when he talks. There is so much you CAN do and see what works.
I'm a little confused about the cat thing. Did he actually do something wrong or did you check on the cats just to make sure since he didn't look like he was going to?
If you focus on the past, you ruin the future. You can only live for today.
The cats are locked in the living room while the builders are in. I gave them food and locked them in at 5am but forgot their litter tray. He just sounded grumpy, arrogant when I asked him to put it in. He says I jumped to conclusions.
I called and said I misunderstood, he said its ok and we'll get dinner tonight.
This is killing me. I know you guys have and are going through it but the pain is so so raw. I've lost my best friend in the world the one who always promised we'd be together forever and now I feel like it was all an illusion in the first place.
I just can't believe how quickly he has changed towards me.
Right. Getting myself together. Going to have a sleep, visualise a great future with H in it and wake up more relaxed and read the book again. Guess I just didn't know what part to start at but I'll figure it out.
