I will bet that she does love you. It's just eroded for a long time, and it's up to you to become the light that beckons her back. Your fear of her not loving you is part of YOU that you will soon dig up, examine, reframe, and resolve AS LONG AS YOU STICK TO YOUR JOURNEY. Don't disappear from this board, don't give up, don't stop reading, don't get lazy, don't hide from yourself. Or, you'll turn into just another schmo with a mediocre existence filled with confusion.
This is exciting. The pain and turmoil. This is your chance to come alive. Let it rip you to shreds, let it burn you and shatter your world. Let it dissolve the old parts of you that hurt and that make no sense. THEN, after a ton of work, you'll be able to truly LOVE... your wife or whomever.
I've only just begun my journey, but I'm so glad I'm not dead and in hiding anymore.
This might make some sense to you now, but I hope it makes even more sense to you in just a few weeks of diligent work.
Welcome to your new beautiful life! Face it head on.
(I'm not a freak, I promise. I'm just so happy to have found my focus, my energy, and some real hope.)
