True, I'm sorry he's still blaming you for everything. As for him not having a place to live? Well, that was his decision wasn't it? I wouldn't even take the time to respond to that. He's wearing the "poor me" attitude right now.
I want to share something that my xh sent to me the other day and keep in mind...he's been on the Mother Ship a very long time. I contacted him to let him know that I had to spend a number of days clearing up an address mess that he created back in 2001/2002 that popped up when it was time for my employment doing a reinvestigation, etc. I asked him about it...his comment was this "you'll always blame me for everything that goes wrong in your life". His projection was to say that he will always blame me for everything that goes wrong in his life. Those who are in mlc and those who never cross over, will never accept responsibility for their actions until they see the light of day.
True, pay him no mind....he hasn't fully looked within nor at the complete "self" in the mirror.
Enjoy your weekend.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
True, firstly, I am so sorry that you are getting this type of reaction from him...secondly, I would ignore him.
No one can say if your H will ever come out of whatever has happened to him and be a better man, or come home, or he may never come out of it...but that is not for you to worry about. You just keep doing what you are doing and be the best you can be and you will see how fabulous things will be for you...I know there is something good right around the corner waiting for you...
Hugs, Valentine
Aug '06: H moved out July '08: H had a kid with the OW May 12 '09: emancipation day
"Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." -Ferris Bueller
I had a nice week-end, above all a lovely Saturday. It was an absolute glorious day, sunny, warm and a beautiful view.
Hi Snodderly,
Nice to hear from you. I have enjoyed reading your post as always.
Quote:
As for him not having a place to live? Well, that was his decision wasn't it? I wouldn't even take the time to respond to that. He's wearing the "poor me" attitude right now
Yes, it was his decision. I have not responded to it. (H has not yet answered my e-mail I sent him on Friday.)
Thank you for sharing your story. When my H got angry pre MLC he used to say to me that I always brought out the worst of him! On the other hand he said that he would not have accomplished as much as he did without me. The two things don't really go together, do they.
Oh well, I got a bit sad this morning. I still think too much about H, especially when I hear about health issues either on the radio or TV. In the afternoon however I was fine again. In fact I got a bit angry at H and that made things slightly easier and miss H less.
I enjoyed yesterday very much since it was the first really nice and warm day of this year.. I went for a very long walk along the waterfront with my GF and afterwards we sat outdoors and had a nice desert. This afternoon I met her again in my favourite restaurant. It was almost overcast but people flogged to the waterfront since it was quite mild and they can go for walks again. We also went for a walk after we had some coffee.
On the dating front I have not heard from "my sailor" anymore but I have a new date tomorrow. I would have preferred to meet the "sailor" first but he seems not to be back from holiday yet. I keep getting guys who write to me that they don't have a mobile phone. I wonder what kind of person has no mobile phone in this time and age? I even know some very old people who have one and can use it as well. They have it mostly for safety reasons.
The days are noticeably getting longer each day and in my garden the snow drops are already out. Soon I will have to do some work in the garden and cut some shrubs which I am not looking forward to.
I hope you had a lovely week-end and wish you a nice week.
Hi Vali
Nice of you to pop round. Thank you for your kind words.
Thanks for your wishes. Unfortuantely, my today's date fell through. The guy wrote that he had to work but maybe we can meet next week. - Is it true or did he get cold feet? I'll never know.
As my mother would have said: you never know what it is good for. - So I might meet "my sailor" first which would work out the way I intended.
True, Your attitude is great. Who knows what happened with the guy who canceled out, but you know what? You just might meet the sailor and hit it off wonderfully. Take it slow and easy and by all means enjoy the dates!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Thank you for your encouragement. I do enjoy the dates but usually I cannot see a R with the guys I meet. The "no expectations" is a great help.
I received an e-mail from "my sailor" today saying that he got home alright but his teenage son got concussion! So he has to pamper him a bit. I guess I will meet him on the week-end only if he has to look after his son. He likes dancing and we might go somewhere. So at least he is still interested in meeting me which is positive.
Yes, the sailor guy sounds lovely but it seems that he does not like to write since he has not written to me anymore. So I don't know what I will do on the week-end.
So you see, this dating business is not easy. My sister asked me once whether I really would want H back after all he did to me and I said yes I would since I still love him and have known him for so long. I know his background and how he behaves, etc., but with a new guy I don't have a clue what I am letting myself in for.
A GF told me that she is reluctant to date since either you like the guy and he does not like you or he likes you and you don't like him. So it seems to be catch 22.
Anyway, I went to a super performance of Cuban dancing last night and enjoyed it very much. I met a FF just by chance and you would not believe it but she got the seat next to me. Tonight I met one of my GFs for a drink. I will see her on the week-end and we will go out again.
It is getting cold again and even supposed to snow in the next two days! Everybody is really getting fed up with winter.
I have not heard from H for a week now and I need an answer from him. He has never done this before and I am getting a bit worried. I hope he is OK.
Oh well, "my sailor" did not contact me and I don't know if he wants to see me on the week-end or at all. But I have already another sailor "on the hook" who is quite a bit older than I and lives further away than the first one which is awkward to get to. He asked me if we could meet on Saturday and I am thinking about it.
Anyway, I have learnt to get on with life if it does not work out the way I want it. I am even contemplating to give up looking for a male companion because lately men have mostly only annoyed me. It seems that I am looking for something that does not exist or then I am looking in the wrong places.
H wrote to me that he is not in a hurry to have me do something for him. So he seems to be alright.
I will go to a jazz concert with a GF tomorrow. I was hoping that "my sailor" would come as well or instead of GF, but now that will probably not be the case.
