I have been gone for Quite a while I guess I needed a break I have been running out of steam! Over the past few weeks my wife has been up and down. I have been doing pretty well in removing negative feelings. Two weeks ago she came home and told me that she was never going to see the other man again. and said that she missed me and was sorry.
I was quite and listened said I support her and that she can take all the time and space she needs. She even went as far the next day to get all of her things from his place.
I didn't jump up and down with excitement because this is the 3rd time. But I was supportive and calm, I need to see actions not just words.
Her mother told me that she was mad at herself and om. Apparently the om was secretly communicating with another women (one he had been cheating with on his wife for 14 years).
2 days later all the signs of her seeing other man returned and she has even been to his ski chalet again. I guess she likes being treated badly herself. This is like the Jerry springer show!!!
I finally have had enough for now I can't live in the house while she is playing house at the OM's. After consultation with my DB Coach I left a letter for her this weekend to find and I got out of dodge staying at my brothers to give her time to think about it.
The letter just made it real I still want to reconcile but right now she has the best of both worlds I take care of the house and share the bills and she gets to play house with him on the weekends. So to rescue my self respect I indicated to her that I realize she doesn't want to reconcile and that I am ready to let her go.(last last resort technique). I also said I am ready for her to move out. She has been telling me that she was moving in with her friend or mother but has done nothing about it.
At this point she needs a reality check and I need some peace. I made the letter about my feelings and her decisions not mentioning the other man. I need to take the driver seat right now.
So now I am just waiting untill monday for her response.
cheers,
the long lost jeff
ME 44 W 32 M 5 T 6
no kids
June 08 I don't want to be married it's not you it's me
