I'm glad that made you laugh. I couldn't stop laughing, either. What a scene. I could see Steve Martin playing your role.
I know what a tough time you are having finding employment. You are probably unable to spend much energy thinking about anything but survival right now. That is OK!
I know you're thinking hard about your next move with your W, but I don't know if now is the time. You need to feel stable and know where your next loaf of bread is coming from before going on to the next levels of Maslow's hierarchy. I've been told to never try to make big decisions in dire times, because you can't possibly have a clear head when stress is clouding it up. Your facing finding a new job and then starting a new job (earning your ranks) -- that is stressful! I would think after you've settled in a new employment situation, you'll be in a better head to decide on how you want to proceed with making earthquakes at home... unless you're a real brazen type who likes to throw everything into the fire at once (to hell with the outcome). But, I don't get that vibe that about you and I sense that you need some security somewhere in your life right now.
So, maybe snuggling up with your soft, cuddly, flannel-clad W can be kind of nice... And slipping your hand underneath to caress her skin can feel sooo good. Remember when you were very young and just discovering sexuality with your "firsts"? They weren't wearing silk and satin, right? They were wearing whatever they wore to school that day. Just feeling another body through fabric was a rush. Even more was the touch of skin, and peeking underneath here and there. Each tiny little advance brought a tidal wave of passion within. In the beginning, we were able to find great sensuality in each other without much pre-meditated preparation. To me, that was HOT beyond hot. I know you're not that young boy anymore, but maybe you can tap into him somehow to enjoy your W more "as is."
I hope my thoughts help in some way. If not, at least we can laugh a bit.
