So I'm choosing to let go. My feelings will fade, and eventually I'm going to choose to protect myself rather than open up to her again. I'm sure I'll always love her in a sense, but I can make the choice not to give her control in my life.
That is how I have been feeling for quite some time. It is a choice to let go, yes. A healthy choice in some cases.
Falling in love may not even be a decision IMO. Loving someone through hot and cold, is. Up to a point. Because creating a fantasy and living in it, where no matter what the other person does, we continue to love and cherish our committement is... dumb. Love between man and woman needs to flow both ways. We cant be stuck forever maintaining our love for someone who treats us badly or is just absent.
In Greek (Hi NoCode) we say eros when it's strictly romantic kind of love, and it's the kind that can be result of an... accident (get in the way of Cupid's arrows aiming for someone else), LOVE is used to describe a deeper more solid feeling that doesnt necessary involve passion or lust. Parents feel love for their children as an example, or love between sibblings, the kind of love that endures anything...
Eros can develop to love, sure. And I guess in long term relationships that's the way it goes. But, in an marriage, the tricky part is to always have small doses of that kind of extra: the lust, the admiration, the excitement... And THAT takes a lot of work. K
