I’m just saying that instead of respecting my H more, it would have made me almost hate him if he had told one person more than whom he did!! I do not think I would have been able to ever go to bed with him again and I am pretty sure I would not have continued to live with him. So, in my case, the marriage would have ended immediately upon my finding out about the exposure.
I used to say if my husband had an affair the marriage would be over. It would end immediately. But one thing I've learned (and this is just my personal experience), sometimes a person doesn't really know how they will react and what they will do until they actually live through it.
And another other thing I've learned... just because something does end immediately, that does not mean it might not resume at a later date. Although there's never guarentees about anything, time can, and often unexpectedly does, change things...
Originally Posted By: sandi2
Let’s be honest here. How many have had “successful” marriages after exposure? How many ended in divorce and how many are struggling to continue in the M?
But was the success, or lack of success, due to who knew or didn't know, or what people outside of marriage thought or did not think... or was it because there was something that split the M apart in the first place (an affair, lies, anger, nutty behavior, etc... on both sides...) and didn't deal with the struggles, learn to work through things, forgive each other for past mistakes, and then move forward to create something new?
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
