Hi, you have come to the right place for help. However, I am afraid you are not going to like what we may have to say. First you asked how to get rid of the craziness. You have to get your focus off your husband and onto you and what you are doing to get a life you enjoy that doesn't include him. Your friends, hobbies, etc. You need to spend a lot of time working out and improving your appearance b/c it is good for your self-esteem. You may look hot, but all of us can use a shot in the arm for ego's sake and striving to look better will do it.
I have to agree that your H is having sex. It is a hard fact to face, but when you add everything up, what would be holding him back? It is not his faithfulness to a great M b/c he wouldn't be spending the night at OW's, looking a porn, and signing you up for swapping partners, or whatever it was....if that was the case. It sounds like he has almost gone off the deep end unless he has always been like this in the sex department. I think his wide mood swings means he is into something, maybe more than you thought, so brace yourself.
What I don't understand is why he stayed with you all those years and the minute you marry him, he is ready to jump ship. Anyway, he may or may not be in MLC, but I think he is addicted to sex. You don't have to be having the physical act (I don't think) to be addicted and he already was into porn heavily and one thing goes into another. It is going to get really bad before much longer if you don't call his hand on it. Once he starts having sex with OW outside of the M, he is a goner.
You need to approach him with the knowledge you have a set your boundaries with what you will put up with and what you will not live with. Don't compromise your standards just to hold on to a husband!
Take care, Sandi
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
