If you can believe it, I don't think my husband is having sex with the OW, but he is certainly having an emotional affair. I think she is pushing for the sex, but she is physically not really his type. He is so confused though, that it is just a matter of time before he crosses that line.
My husband is young and immature. He came into the relationship with nothing and I had everything (the irony is now that he makes more than me by a ton and if we split, I lose out big time). He benefited by me having assets, but now that is one of his issues. He feels like nothing was ever his/he never came first/I never showed him enough love.... Those are the things he likes to blame me for, but he never remembers what he says half the time. I REMEMBER EVERYTHING HE SAYS...
My husband also looks at porn..a lot of online porn. Sex used to be an issue for us, but about 2 years ago, things got a lot better. We were also trying for children before the bomb hit.
This one might make you squirm..again with my snooping, I found out that my husband had registered us for a swingers website!!!! Wow!!!! Not something we have discussed at all and the questions keep going from there. Why register us if he is planning on leaving? Is that what this whole thing is about is sex addiction and his need for more? This is the kind of stuff that keeps me awake at night and CRAZY!!!! It is so hard not to confront him on that one!!!!
How many times has your wife flipped on a dime before she finally decided to stay and work? I keep getting the standard line that "I just want to be alone and have no responsibility. I am selfish". Yet, who goes away for the weekend with the OW and who keeps coming to me for sex? Not someone who really wants to be alone?!
Again, I really appreciate your honesty and the sounding board. It is so hard to try to tell this kind of stuff to your friends (who love you but have opinions and judge). If you haven't been through it...you just don't get it. Sigh...
