So at home there was more talk about the house which turned into "are you going to be ok with us living together. I told her not a problem. I see no reason why we can't live together and get along. I told her I know where she stands and she knows where I stand. (I want to work on the M and she does not.)
I wouldn't have said, "no problem". I just get this sense that you are playing Mr. Good guy. Know what? It's okay to not like this. It's okay to not want to live as a roommate with your wife. It's okay to say, "It's okay temporarily, but I don't want to live as roommates for very long. So hopefully you have somewhere else you can stay soon."
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The same feelings of devistation keep coming back. It is hard to get them to go away.
Ask yourself why so much devastation. I get it...she wants to divorce you. Was the marriage so wonderful that there are no benefits to you being free from it? My experience with marriage is that it's not necessarily the greatest thing ever. And my experience with post-divorced life is it was neither the best thing ever or the worst thing ever. There's bonuses to being your own man. Look ahead. What does life as a single guy hold for you? It doesn't have to be about finding a rapid replacement for you wife...but life, even single and not looking, can be nice. Sure, you'd like to share it with her, but that isn't your decision, it's hers. She's choosing to walk away from it. Who knows if she'll regret it. But you don't have to curl up and die. You can enjoy life. You can do things that she probably stood in the way of you doing. Let your hair down. Enjoy this time.
You cannot be lonely if you like the person you're alone with. Dr. Wayne Dyer