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Kissak, I'm so sorry that you are going through all of this yet AGAIN !!!!

I can't tell you what to do..as I have no idea what would be better....go with your gut. Instinct is usually the best to go on.

(((((hugs))))) and take care x


Love Cinders xxx

"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus

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kissak Offline OP
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Thanks Cinders....My gut is telling me to run. But Im not ready to do that yet. I dont think. But I may just have to.

Im wondering now what I might need to be prepared to say if he does decide that leaving and staying gone is best. I dont know how I should handle it.

Any words of advice?


Kissak

"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." Psalms 56:3
M-37 H-37
S-10, D-15
M- 1993
First bomb- 12/23/06
Came and went too MANY times!
Gone again 10-25-10
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 3,525
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kissak Offline OP
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Hello??


Kissak

"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." Psalms 56:3
M-37 H-37
S-10, D-15
M- 1993
First bomb- 12/23/06
Came and went too MANY times!
Gone again 10-25-10
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 9,762
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((((((((Kissak))))))))))

I'm afraid I have no words of advice either. All I can say is this.....back to the trust issue.

Is he earning your trust? Doesn't sound like he has a clue how much trust his R with this OW is eroding. He is in the same pattern he always has been. That is his comfort zone. You have your own comfort zone and he doesn't seem to fit into that.

Do what you need to do for your own wellbeing. That's all I can say.

I'm here for you!!!

BTW, are you in the alt?


T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43
bomb12/4/07
PA5/07
S12/26/07
D final 11/17/08
Back together with no defined R 05/2010
confused....to say the least!!!

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kissak Offline OP
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Originally Posted By: mishka422


BTW, are you in the alt?


Not sure what that is?




Thanks for your words though. Im struggling between wanting my marriage to work and thinking it never will. I see him in this cycle over and over again. Even now if he decides not to come back, I know that he will want to in a few weeks or months. He will never be happy with whatever decision he makes. He will always wonder if it was the right one.

Looks like Im going to have to be the one to make the final decision...for my sake.


Kissak

"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." Psalms 56:3
M-37 H-37
S-10, D-15
M- 1993
First bomb- 12/23/06
Came and went too MANY times!
Gone again 10-25-10
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 3,525
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kissak Offline OP
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Sorry....yes I am in the alt.


Kissak

"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." Psalms 56:3
M-37 H-37
S-10, D-15
M- 1993
First bomb- 12/23/06
Came and went too MANY times!
Gone again 10-25-10
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 7,791
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Posts: 7,791
Kissak,

Mishka is right.

The choice is yours, and always has been.

It's a tough one, but best made by YOU !

Take care xxx


Love Cinders xxx

"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus

http://miesblogspot.blogspot.com/
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 9,762
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Mind if I look you up in the alt? Send me a hint in the right direction or possibly a mutual friend. \:\)

Like I said, do whatever YOU need to do to find your happiness. His life and what he chooses to do with it is none of your concern.


T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43
bomb12/4/07
PA5/07
S12/26/07
D final 11/17/08
Back together with no defined R 05/2010
confused....to say the least!!!

Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 3,525
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kissak Offline OP
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Thanks you guys...yes it is my decision and I have been seriously thinking on telling him that. I just have to really mean it when I say it.

Mishka you can find me on MWG or dar's. They will let you know how to find me! Thanks!


Kissak

"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." Psalms 56:3
M-37 H-37
S-10, D-15
M- 1993
First bomb- 12/23/06
Came and went too MANY times!
Gone again 10-25-10
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 3,525
K
kissak Offline OP
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I feel bad sometimes that I cant trust my H....but he made it that way.

He went to the store last night and all I could think was he went to see the possible OW.

But he did go to the store. I feel like screaming sometimes.

And he is so weird sometimes.

He is always so curious about what Im doing, but acts as if it doesnt matter. What could that mean?

Like, I asked him to pick up our son from me at work yesterday. He said he would then asked did I have somewhere to go. I just replyed yes, knowing all the while he would ask where I was going. And he did a few minutes later. Then comes back with "it doesnt matter"....ok, then why ask?

Then when he called me last night I kinda got off of the phone with him in a hurry because I was doing something online. Well, he then goes online from his phone and comes on my messenger to say "you sure did jump online real quick". I feel like i am constantly being put under suspiscion, but when I ask why he does that, he says just because, no reason, doesnt matter.

Is it that I dont want you but I dont want anyone else to have you syndrome??

Or is it something else? Drives me crazy sometimes.


Kissak

"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." Psalms 56:3
M-37 H-37
S-10, D-15
M- 1993
First bomb- 12/23/06
Came and went too MANY times!
Gone again 10-25-10
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