Well, now I feel sort of stupid. I just remembered that there is a car just like OM's that is there. I hope I'm not an idiot!
Anyway, OK, so I'm mentally composing some sort of "Dear John" letter to W for the end of the month. I do feel like there needs to be some sort of closure - I hope I will have a revelation in the next few days.
------------------------------------------------------ W, I wanted to follow up with you on our dissolution chat. I provided you with the information you asked for, but still haven't heard anything from you on the information I requested. I'm unsure as to what the delay is; it has been two weeks since I asked you for just a few simple things.
I have offered to pay for the dissolution processing costs, and it is not a time-consuming process. It has been a month and a half since we first started discussing things, and I've received nothing from you except for a few vague questions.
I also want you to know that I do not want our marriage and family to end. I do not want a dissolution. I am only accepting one because I feel like I need to be a moral example to our children: in the face of an affair, and your unwillingness to work on our marriage and relationship.
I will leave this option open - if you will end the affair, I would be willing for us to be together as a family. I do not have answers for what you and I would do as far as "being friends", but I know how happy it makes the kids when we are together as a family, and I would be OK with just starting with that.
I would appreciate an update.
Thanks, Me --------------------------------------------------
Here is what I want to get across - three points: 1. I am absolutely willing and ready to end the relationship to do the "right thing" - I have told her before that I'm ready to move on. 2. Reiterate that dissolution/divorce is not my choice, it is HERS and I'm just along for the ride 3. Provide her with an option to make things right - but be firm that I won't do anything as long as there is an affair. I specifically tried to be vague about our relationship - I don't want to push across any expectations - so maybe I should leave it out. I also don't want her to think that this month of going dark has been a trick - so my instinct right now is to continue it for some period of time after sending this email.
I feel like I need to say something at the end of my week - but I want it to be a situation where I simply confirm for her that she needs to make a move.
Of course, there is a part of me that is fearful that she will simply respond and say she almost has paperwork ready, but that's what I'm preparing for now.
Feel free to 2x4 away - this is like a draft of a draft of a thought.
