I struggle with stuff like this - I felt like I was "enabling" W when she moved out; there is that panicked feeling.
However, hindsight being 20/20 - I know that the separation period will be just the thing needed to turn things around, or it'll be just the thing needed to allow us to detach.
You did NOT send a mixed message - HE chose to leave, you simply are helping him not be in a place he doesn't want to be in.
It's so hard to realize that clinging and hanging on to your H will drive him away. My suggestion to you is this:
DON'T be available. If he calls, let it go to VM, and call back later. Send a text if it is something short and sweet. Start going out, working out, make appointments with friends, etc. Shoot, go to the library for a couple of hours, worst case. I think it's OK to have a friendly conversation as long as HE starts it.
