We talked last Thursday. I went by my script, she took it suprisingly good. Didn't have much resistance about the new cell phone. W tried to tease me and said something like "I don't see the reason why would I do that. He promised me that he would not call, email or text me. Plus if I'd like to cheat on you I could give him my new number..". My response was; "Well, maybe he said that he wouldn't but give him few more days and I promise you he will try. As far as giving him new number, do it and I'd have my answer!"
She hasn't apologized yet. Said something like:"You're a man with a big heart and opened mind. After what I've done, you're willing to take me back and fight to fix our M. I don't know if I'd ever be able to do the same if I was in your shoes. I admire you for that and I'll do my best to work on it too". Words... I'd rather wait for the action.
Gave her the wedding ring back, took it with a warm smile, but ever since it's been sitting on the night stand. Don't know if it's worth to push the subject or should I just wait few more days. I've already started wearing my ring again.
I know that this whole thing will not improve overnight and it'll take a long time to heal our M. I feel like we're on a "trial period".
Everyday life is goes on almost as nothing never happened but I've been trying to be more attentive, spend more time together, talk and listen to what she has to say.
W said that she felt insecure, lost, neglected and desperate in the end and that's why she did what she did. On the other hand told me that "OM is a good, decent man and if she wouldn't be married and I (meaning me) wouldn't be who I am, she would stay with him". It hurts, but at least she's been trying to be honest.
We promised each other that we'd never hide our emotions and feelings no matter how painfull they may be.
For the last few days I've been working on getting her a new job at my place, maybe I'll be able to pull it off.
Despite all these positive changes I still have this fear on the back of my head that one day I'll come back from work and she'll be gone again. This time for good. Don't know how to defeat this feeling...
I've been reading DR book again, trying to focus on the 7 step programm. If you have any suggestions I'll be here...
Puppy: how was the retrouvaille weekend? I've been thinking about it for a while and now even W said she would do it.
